Sexuality and Freedom


Two quotes on the subject “freedom”: I take me the freedom. – Everything is possible, nothing is binding.

The first slogan is from a cigarette advertising. Smoking and being free. How limited someone has to be to create such a slogan? It’s the same as to say, eat as much as you want, give free reign to your appetite and you will lose weight. That’s impossible. That’s clear to the common sense. Just now after Christmas a short view on the scale is enough. The 2 or 3 kilos more are something like a experiment on yourself to disprove this thesis very fast.

Why nevertheless is the cigarette advertising such successful? The attempt to compare freedom with smoking isn’t very new and has been made since the invention of the “Marlboro-Man” many years ago. And right now where smokers are discriminated by society, smoking gets the touch of a struggle for freedom. Look, there behind the fly brake in the smoking area the last group of rebells is standing, which doesn’t bow to the rules of a technocratic society. That’s something.

I remember the angry looking old women in the sidewalk cafe and their pretended, self-righteous coughing to show that they were disturbed by the smell of my cigarette, although smoking was allowed outdoors. Besides I don’t know any longtime smoker who hadn’t dreamed about finishing smoking. At the latest when they notice the harmful side affects on their own body. Not to speak about the “breeze of freedom” (stink) which surrounds every strong smoker. Since a long time smoking is anything else but “sexy”.

The second slogan: Everything is possible, nothing is binding, sounds similarly to the first like freedom and tolerance. That have to be very free, tolerant and free people who use such words! So you could think after first reading. I found this sentence at a swinger homepage. Couples or singles meet in a club to give free reign to their sexual passion. The “new” morality, which rather reminds of the orgies of the old Rome than of progress, is insofar modern because its correlate to the zeitgeist. With other words: Everything is allowed – when the other takes part. That means in reverse that everybody who doesn’t share our moral philosophy is narrow-minded and an intolerant moralist.

But how free is a human, whose life is determined by the sexual lust of the body?

What kind of life is that, that longs addicted for the next sex like a drug addict for the next shot? Sex becomes to an exclusive norm for my doing, and so it seems today, doesn’t need any intimacy.

Intimacy” is according to Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary:

1. the state of having a close personal relationship with somebody

The old intimacy between them had gone for ever.

2. a thing that a person says or does to somebody that they know very well

3. (formal or law) sexual activity, especially an act of sexual intercourse

Singles or couples driven by their lust and longing for recognition post their sexual activities public in the Internet. Although intimacy and shame are inseparably connected with our identity as humans. If everything is shown to all, if everybody can have sex with everybody, if everything is possible, the human reduces himself / herself to his / her body and desires.

What kind of relationship is that, when people sell their intimacy to curiosity and for “Likes”? What weird kind of broken identity is that, when mind and soul are subordinated to the body and its desires, and not vice versa?

What kind of love is that, which is unable to hold its fire, when the other sometimes has no lust or doesn’t like some sorts of sexual practices? “We still don’t fit together”, they say. The search for fulfillment goes on. “The next one, please!”

They forgot or it is totally unknown to them, that a fulfilled relationship is not expressed by having the same sexual preferences, because the human is an identity, a soul or a personality. A fulfilled relationship primarily doesn’t depend on having the same sexual preferences, but depends on being soul mates who swing mentally and emotionally together – that’s called love.

Popular wisdom says: Sex is the most beautiful minor matter in the world. Just minor matter not the main thing. When a human makes sexuality to the main thing of his / her life, he / she loses himself / herself as a human to an idle and his / her life misses its fulfillment. Since Christ we know, that we are created as God’s image.

The human is more than his / her body, more than lust and desire. Christ shows us the meaning of our lives, which finds its fulfillment in being one with God. To follow Christ means to find the way to freedom because he really makes us free (John 8:36).